Started writing a post about the state of the blog, didn't like where it was going. Twice. Too much doom and gloom. You know where the world's at, and I'm busy, too, so ... fuck it. Prime function of the blog is me talking about rpg stuff I have on my mind. That did connect with some sort of "scene" a couple of years back, but now I'm truly lost in the woods. I should embrace that and move on. If you encounter this post on your travels through the internet, I hope you'll sit down with me for a couple of minutes and lend me an ear. Maybe we'll chat a bit, too. Then we move on.
For today we'll have a little retrospective about how it all came together ... until it didn't. Enjoy!
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| Proper artwork? |
So many words to talk about ... what again?
A
lot of me writing here was about me finding my own voice in a thriving
hobby space. Back when I started 12 years ago (and I was late to the
party) the retro-clone movement was in full swing and all people did was
sharing fantastic facets of what our hobby can be. Lots of fun, all
around. And what a rabbit hole to jump into! So many small creators,
lots of diy. Inspiring, all of it.
The OSR bitch fights came later, but not much later (although it always had the occasional flame wars).
Back then I tried a lot. And I wrote a lot, although more short pieces. 214 posts in the first three years alone. Looking back at it, I think I managed to find out a lot about myself over the years and how I play games. Enough to start designing and writing some of my own as well. This was always supposed to be a trial and error approach to game design (hence the title of the blog), so I would find an idea, play around with it, and put it aside for a while. Often promising some sort of follow up I wouldn't deliver.
Kinda "sounded great at the time" way of gamer ADD. But nothing stuck.
What started with exploring where to go, pretty definitely settled for "doing something with D&D no one thought about", mainly because the more fringe thinkers of the scene had the most inspiring stuff to begin with. They talked "world engines" and weird narrative constructs and non linear settings with lots of interesting twists to dive into.
All
of it fed my D&D RC camapign rules. As a matter of fact, I tested
and changed so much that one player actually threatened to leave the
game if I kept adding and tinkering. Can't fault the guy. He'd been
somewhere on the autism spectrum, and for him playing D&D with me
was what for a cat is petting it the wrong way.
Anyway, so the blogging went on and gaming fell a bit behind. I'd still write about D&D now and again, but my focus shifted a bit towards the theoretical of it all.
I know the exact moment that changed: November 30th, 2014. Pretty much exactly 3 years into blogging.
The clip linked in that post changed the trajectory of the blog for good. The post directly after that already formulates the core idea that made Lost Songs of the Nibelungs. There is your spark, the idea that started it all: Charisma is not a good word for what it does in D&D.
With that, I seriously
started dismantling D&D. Here's an attempt to replace most of the
terms on an old school character D&D sheet with synonyms. See how
that jives with you (and what a game using those terms would be like):
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| Only change terms, get a different game? |
The ideas started coming, I kept on the ball, people started being enthusiastic about it and even left comments. Those were the days. Good times.
After a couple of months, talking LSotN looked a bit like this:
Along that, I started chewing through what kind of world this would be set in. I was burning fuel on all cylinders, so to say. And that ended up to be the main focus of a lot of my writing in the last 10 years, one way or another. As a matter of fact, just the other day my good friend Mark pointed out to me that every game design I did in the last 10 years was, in the end, about LSotN. Damn.
A complicated approach to game design ...
However, back then I was in no way, shape or form ready to write and publish a complete role-playing game.
Contrary to popular belief, it actually takes a lot to write a book and process it to a point where it can be published, even if you have (to accept) low standards. So if this were to be my opus magnum, I had ways to go to get it out there.
And development would hit walls, obviously. To this day it needs a system for magic that fits the game and that I'm happy with. Not for lack of trying, but I'm not there yet. Same goes for the GM side of the game. Although that has lots of working pieces, it'll need some more ideas incorporated to be where I'd like it to be.
Progress on that has been slow, but not zero. Which segues into another aspect of what I'm trying to do here: the more complex a problem appears to be, the more I tend to look for ways to explore it indirectly. Because sometimes the solution is found by exploring the opposite or only aspects of it. But that could lead to writing another entire game first.
Yeah.
And I'm not that fast to begin with.
So a lot on the blog looks like me shifting focus on something entirely different, like developing a lite rules system for a DungeonPunk setting, while truly exploring how complete a system on the GM side needs to be to create a sufficient and distinct gaming experience, like this a mission generator.
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| It's called Brawlers! now ... |
Or find new walls to hit ...
I write about some of it and call it a blog. Haha.
When all is said and done, I ended up with lots of little ideas and concepts, some follow me unfinished to this day (The Goblintribe Generator, among others), some stand on their own very well (the Random Narrative Generator being the biggest one).
And then, all of a sudden ...
... I start something, and actually finish it. Although "sudden" is a bit of s stretch, as you might have guessed already. Anyway, first major publication happens May 2017 and is called Monkey Business. Not a game, but a game supplement for Labyrinth Lord. Still HUGE in scope, around 120 pages, offering enough ideas and tools to create a whole campaign, no less.
I started it as PWYW to see if that
worked. Did so for 5 years and it didn't work, so now it costs what I
think it's worth. It was downloaded roughly 500 times, but paid for only
50 times (yes, two short of making copper, after all those years).
I consider it a success, especially when taking into account that it was the first proper publication I got out there. Alas, it was more or less ignored by what the "OSR" was back then. Bit of a bummer. But I got some reports from people playing it, and all of them had a blast.
The bigger picture was, that I got to play with some DM tools in general. Some of Lost Songs made it into the book (a variant of the Random Terrain Generator, for instance), some of what I tried there will make it into Lost Songs. Eventually.
Another aspect was learning a bit more about publishing using Scribus and inkscape.
At that point I thought things would take up some speed, too, and I'd keep pushing modules out there. Yet again, I found rabbit holes to fall into. Wanted to write a more contemporary module with the working name "Robo-Hitler". A grindhouse shlockfest about shooting historical Nazis that use (alien?) tech for their nefarious plots ...
But the game I
wanted to use for it, I couldn't use (the designer basically said, he
has different plans and I shouldn't), so that opened a can of worms,
because now I needed a set of rules. I thought I'd go and use my D&D
house rules, make a LL supplement out of it and have it with the
module. So I started digging into that before starting with the module.
Meanwhile
LL fell into decline and the OSR stopped being what it had been. Things
shifted, as they always would, given time enough. And I gave it plenty
of time.
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| *sigh* ... never mind. [source] |
It just didn't happen in a vacuum. Not only did I start working on (at least) four more modules, some of those would also need a be67 fantasy supplement before they can see publication. I have that in pieces (27 classes, original magic system ...), but it needs to be written and layouted, of course.
All the while I kept
playtesting and developing Lost Songs. Eventually I'd hit the final wall
(magic just would not manifest) and I shifted focus to yet another
game: ORWELL. It was about a lot I had on my mind at the time, and also
something completely different. An original set of rules, from start to
end (although parts of Lost Songs would find its way into this as well).
That game, however, I would get done. It was even more fringe than Lost Songs will ever be, but it is complete ... and opened up even more strands of ideas and concepts to follow up on (see the "Would You Play That?"-Series here on the blog).
Every now and then I get an idea for (the now called) Brawlers as well, and that game ALSO has seen some writing. It also gave me ideas for at least FOUR more games featuring aspects of the rules written for it. Rebellion was one of those, and fell out of my hands completely by accident.
It was a set of rules that occured to me over night, and gave me a great opportunity to play around with Midjourney for a bit.
I know, it's crazy. When all is said and done, I might have around 30 projects in my WIP folders, done to one degree or another (some only concepts, some with writing, some have even seen playtesting ...)
Eventually, I had to get back to LSotN
All of the above somehow feeds into Lost Songs, one way or another. And I have the blog to prove it. Ha. But where's that game at?
Well.
I never finished thinking about it, but also didn't get a chance to work on it again. But I got to read Hrolf Kraki's Saga by Poul Anderson last year (2023) and it hit me right in the feels. That book reads like a session report of Lost Songs of the Nibelungs, and I'm not even kidding. It's EXACTLY what the game is about and how it actually plays.
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| Recommended reading ... |
My good friend Mark also keeps pestering me about finishing it. And while I started a shit load of projects, he might be right that it is time to tackle this beast again. I'd have to see what I got and where I need to go with it. Maybe write the whole thing from scratch? Because ...
Because I've come some way since I
last touched LSotN. Not only because the last four years sucked HARD
and did not go by without taking a toll. No, I think my outlook overall
changed quite some bit. Or rather, I'm a bit further down the road I
wanted to take while the road ALSO changed. Although I'm still somewhat lost, I feel I have a better
grasp at what this game is supposed to be.
Either way, I'm ready to get back into playtesting again. Time to put some more energy into this beast
What about EVERYTHING ELSE?
I know, loaded question. I'm talking projects, not state of worldly affairs ... I got a review for ORWELL, but it's not a good one. Guy didn't read it in depth, then said it was too convoluted ... I mean, I get it, for it to be content it needs to be processed fast, and ORWELL definitely needs some digestion, which runs counter to that. He says as much (and he wanted to like it).
In the end, I feel the review ended up being somewhat unfair but well intended. I mean him no harm, after all it got some eyes on the book, and we are not done talking about it (I think?), so his "3 of 5, satisfactory" is fine.
And he gets the setting mostly right, so there is that.
However, it makes you wonder how one can review a game that hasn't even been played, because playing it might at least make sure that its read deeply enough to use it.
You wanna get a free look at the book and some words on it, too (with the caveats I offered above), go and see it here. James might end up giving it a run at his virtual table. Not holding my breath here, but if it were to happen, I'd very much looking forward to it. He might end up liking it after all. Either way, I'd accept his final word on it even if his result doesn't change.
I also got a chance to do a Q&A about the game over at The Hardboiled GMshoe's Office. It was done via their discord server Randomworlds TTRPG Chatroom, which is all kinds of fun and well worth checking out!
Other than that, I keep trucking. some things in the works, might actually get something new finished soon. Playtests for Angry Little Aliens VERSUS King Arthur have been VERY promising, but to make that a book is still some work. And I'm already chewing on something new ... We'll see.
As far as the blog is concerned, I'll make this a series about rediscovering Lost Songs of the Nibelungs, but I might have a couple of other ideas worth following up (rules for immortals in be67/BASIC, for instance). It happens when it happens, but it will happen :)
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