Wednesday, November 18, 2020

State of the Blog 2020 (Still-Alive-Edition)

Let's start with 3 sentences that need writing regularly: Hey friends and neighbors. I hope you are all well out there. I've been so busy ... I'd also love to be able to say: every word written here takes time from the publication I'm working on. 2020 being as it is, not so much. That said, I have to address it at some point, right?

2020 couldn't be over fast enough ...

That fucking year. All the free time you'd want and no brain left to do anything but trying to calm down ALL THE FUCKING TIME. And I've been more lucky than most, I think. Didn't lose my job, always had toilet paper (although that was a close call, tbh, and mostly because they like me at the supermarket I frequent ... love those girls) and I didn't catch IT (I think).

Nonetheless, the fear is real. Confronted with death does that to you, right? At first I couldn't do anything, then I couldn't do much beyond functioning on a servicable fashion (that is: work to keep the roof above the head, so to say) and right now, with the year already closing, I'm looking back and there is less done than I'd have done in a NORMAL year.

Most creatives I know had problems like this. Existential dread will paralyze you and, if nothing else, it will have you shift gears to adjust to the new world surrounding you. I'd wager we will see quite the change in the material that'll be made available and popular in the very near future. If earlier crises are any indicator, it'll be way more dark memento mori shit on the one side and way more happy-happy carpe diem shit on the other.

For now, though, I wasn't able to shift registers just yet. I'm still very close to publishing that game I've been talking about. I'm proud of how that shapes up so far, but still way behind (if you haven't guessed). We'll try for Christmas, no promisses ...

Where to go from here? What's happening?

If nothing else, it made me realize how weak I am and I hope it is a lesson I can take to heart for the future. I have heard something said during the lockdown that I agreed with at the time, but didn't process it to its full extent, I guess. If I remember correctly, it'd been an old lady in the UK that had been asked about the lockdown, and she said somethig to the effect that, if you live your life in fear of something happening to you, you are already dead (or "you are not living at all", not sure ... also, not sure if it matters). I think I get it now.

That said, it's already taxing to write this little post here, so I should keep it short. I have some ideas for future posts and, as I said, a game to publish. I plan to tackle a module next I've been talking about a couple of years ago: THE RISE OF ROBO-HITLER ... some brainless splatterfest where sploitation-savvy players can have some gory fun hunting down evil Nazi mutants in a Labyrinth Lord game (or something like that).

I think it'd be tremendous fun writing that, and that's the point. Something to look forward to. I also have the guy to illustrate it, and that'll be a wild ride as well. Stay tuned for that happening in the next 10 years or so :D I will be faster, though. Pinky-promise.

Also next in line: more Lost Songs of Nibelungs! I need a working understanding of all the little and big things developed in that regard in the last couple of years. A fusion of all I have into one coherent mess (instead of the incoherent mess it is right now). I learned a lot finishing Ø2\\'3|| for publication (which was the point in doing it to begin with) and I think I can give that my best effort now. Starting some time next year.

I'll also read more and play more, maybe cut down the Social Media a bit more and concentrate a bit more on blogging again. Clean my act, maybe write a novel ...

So to close on a more positive note: I believe we will get out of this and we will be better for it, although maybe only on a personal level (the world is spiralling right now, not sure where that's going). Growth is difficult, and should be. How else would you know that something changed? So let's see this as a chance, right?

Is he right? [Source]

Although I'm not able right now to write a post as lengthy as usual (or with any kind of substance, I'm afraid), I wanted to take the opportunity to ask you good people out there how you've been faring? How's things? I'd be happy to chat about shit a bit in the comments, if there's any interest at all for something like this ... Shoot me what you have, gaming or not.

More soon(-ish) :) Stay safe, people, and stay healthy.